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2019 年朝邦對話新訊息 春季刊 / CP Yen Foundation Dialogue Newsletter, Spring Issue

《2019 年對話新訊息 春季刊》


朝邦文教基金會12月即將舉辦『對話影響力』表揚,自三月份以來陸續在「對話力」粉絲頁,以生活化的方式介紹群眾了解什麼是「對話文化」。本春季刊有請星座老師帶領大家看看『對話力-化衝突為合作的神奇力量』一書中談到的10 大心智坑洞。希望會引起您的好奇!

各星座最常犯的10個心智坑洞

作者:星座老師沐禾/ 部落客貝大小姐與瑞餚姐

CP Yen Foundation Dialogue Newsletter, Spring Issue

CP Yen Foundation will host “Dialogue Impact Award” to appreciate those who embodies the dialogue culture. To increase the understanding of dialogue, we have posted short articles on Dialogue FB since March. This Spring issue is aimed at the 10 potholes in the Dialogue (from the book “ The Magic of Dialogue” ) , connecting the dialogical behaviors with zodiac characteristics. Hope you will find it interesting !

10 Common Dialogue Potholes for Different Zodiac Signs

By Soma, Miss Belle and Mademoiselle Rachel

=======================================

各星座最常犯的10個心智坑洞

作者:星座老師沐禾/ 部落客貝大小姐與瑞餚姐

你會不會聊天啊…

是對方腦子有洞還是我們自己的心智有洞呢?
一起來看看各星座在聊天和對話中最常犯了哪些心智坑洞


I. 很難主動開啟對話
A. 巨蟹座 (6月22日-7月22日)
喜歡猜別人心裡想甚麼,不太愛說自己的想法,他們很重視對方的感受,因此在尚未確認對方是否能接受所談論的內容前,寧可不說!
B. 金牛座 (4月20日~ 5月20日)
本身就不愛說話的金牛座,表達的方式比較喜歡藉由音樂或是藝術的方式呈現,在說話上也偏愛比喻,常讓人無法清楚了解他們真正想說的
 
II. 困在自己的框架中
A. 魔羯座( 12月21日 ~ 1月20日)
喜愛規則的魔羯座最容易受困於自己所設的框架之中,要讓他們打破框架得從書中或是期刊論文中尋找答案,而這樣盡信書,也是一種框架
B. 巨蠍座 (6月22日-7月22日)
喜歡用自己熟悉的習慣與觀念來思考,甚至認為他們之所以會這麼習慣代表這樣的模式最好,這其實就是他們框住自己的地方
 
III. 回來,我們還沒聊到那邊耶
A. 牡羊座 (3月21日~ 4月19日)
衝動的牡羊座常常陷入急於行動中,尚未完全聽進或聽懂他人說的話就已經先表達自己的想法了,或著以為自己懂了,就率先採取行動了
B. 射手座 (11月22日 ~ 12月20日)
有遠見卻缺乏短期行動方針的射手朋友,常常忽略細節問題,聽到了,卻可能沒有真正進入自己的系統裡,沒有想得很清楚就急於行動
   
IV. 有聽沒有進
A. 處女座 (8月23日 ~ 9月22日)
腦子裡都是自己的想法與自己想說的,做不到傾聽,愛採用忍耐勝甚於溝通,但同時又愛抱怨自己所忍耐的任何事,嘮叨就聽不進別人所說的
B. 雙子座 (5月21日~ 6月21日)
喜愛新鮮事物的雙子朋友,只選擇他們想聽的,像是八卦或是新鮮的話題,也早已習慣不認真聽了,若話題不對味,魂就飄走了
 
V. 我們說A你卻說B
A. 水瓶座 (1月21日 ~ 2月19日) 
擅長跳躍性思考的水瓶座朋友,總會從其他觀點來看事物,讓人有耳目一新的感覺,但也很容易畫錯重點,讓人覺得你到底有沒有搞清楚我們現在在聊什麼?
B. 雙子座 (5月21日~ 6月21日)
很重視當下氣氛愉快的雙子座,有時為了要炒熱氣氛,通常會提出適合當下但根本不是自己主張的話題,他們認為那才是有趣,但場合有時不恰當
 
VI. 太誇張、太over了喔
A. 獅子座 (7月23日~ 8月22日)
害怕被排擠和被忽略的獅子座朋友,為了要鎂光燈聚焦在自己身上,喜歡刻意去找別人缺少的部分,並浮誇表現引人注目
B. 雙子座 (5月21日~ 6月21日)
最會見人說人話的雙子座朋友,看場合選擇話語,常常配合場子需求說了不太真心或著失真的話術,雖然不走誇張路線,但那些也都不是真的
 
VII. 喜愛爭辯
A. 處女座 (8月23日 ~ 9月22日)
總是不缺理由與藉口的處女座更是找碴高手,因為他們愛抱怨的性格加上注重細節的本能,讓他們變成了爭辯的高手
B. 水瓶座 (1月21日 ~ 2月19日)
天生反骨叛逆的水瓶座朋友,最喜歡為反對而反對,總想要推翻舊的觀念與價值,用革命的方式讓自己的意見創立新的體系
 
VIII. 永遠的反對者
A. 水瓶座 (1月21日 ~ 2月19日)
就是要跟別人不一樣啊,不然會覺得很無聊,這就是水瓶的天性,若沒有巧妙地運用他們的反對性格,會讓大家對話很難進行下去
B. 牡羊座 (3月21日~ 4月19日)
有時候會有死小孩的個性,在那樣的狀態下才會當反對者,也不用試著說服他們了,此時理智與理論跟他們說不上話
 
IX. 偏執狂
A. 射手座 (11月22日 ~ 12月20日)
永遠認為自己是對的,因為他們是用神的高度在看事情,因此普通人在爭論的事情,對他們來說沒意義,因為他們偏執的是自己永遠是對的,所以任何事都沒有討論空間
B. 摩羯座 (12月21日 ~ 1月20日)
倚賴自身的經驗值來判斷事情與他人,認為自己可以做到別人也一定可以,更常因為沒有這樣的自身經驗,而容易全盤否定或以偏概全
 
X. 愛作秀
A. 獅子座 (7月23日~ 8月22日)
享受被讚美被崇拜的感覺,重點根本不在當下所討論的事情,他要被注意、被聚焦,喜歡作秀
B. 摩羯座 (12月21日 ~ 1月20日)
有控制狂的魔羯座,想要全方位掌控對話的過程與結果,一點都不想被反駁,基於這樣的控制慾,會讓人有作秀的感覺
 
是不是找不到你的星座啊,是不是覺得好險我沒有心智坑洞呢,另外三個星座,我們提出他們在對話力上的優點:
 
天秤座 (9月23日 ~ 10月23日)
擅長把話說得很好聽讓別人可以接受,也非常願意傾聽,但在判斷上比較優柔寡斷些。
 
雙魚座2月20日 ~ 3月20日)
講話容易沒有重點,也不喜歡出頭,常常在團體當中的存在感較低,活在自己的世界裡,在外界看來是狀況外
 
天蠍座10月24日 ~ 11月21日)
不太多話,但話鋒一出必毒,要的就是一針見血,但邏輯清新以及條理分明是天蠍的優點
 
對話力是化衝突為合作的神奇力量,善用個星座的特點以及閃避各星座的心智坑洞,相信在許多對話的場合上,才不會落入各說各話毫無交集的情境中。
 
 
你會不會聊天啊…
是對方腦子有洞還是我們自己的心智有洞呢?
一起來看看各星座在聊天和對話中最常犯了哪些心智坑洞

<最常犯的10個心智坑洞>出自於『對話力-化衝突為合作的神奇力量』一書,朝邦基金會出版


 =================================================

10 Common Dialogue Potholes for Different Zodiac Signs

By Soma, Miss Belle and Mademoiselle Rachel



Can you make a conversation?
Is there a pothole in their brain or is there a hole in our mindset?
Let us take a look at some of the common dialogue potholes for different zodiac signs. 

 
I. Holding Back: Difficulty in initiating a conversation

A. Cancer (June 22-July 22)
Cancer like to guess what other people are thinking; however, they seldom reveal their inner feelings. They value other people’s feelings. Before they make sure if their ideas would be acceptable, they rather stay quiet!

B. Taurus (April 20-May 20)
Somewhat quiet, Taurus like to express their feelings through music or arts. In conversations, they like metaphors. It’s often difficult to understand what they really want to say.
 
II. Being locked into a box: being stuck in his or her own head

A. Capricorn (Dec 21-Jan 20)
A person who likes to follow the rules, Capricorn often find themselves stuck in their own boxes. To take them out of that established framework, they sometimes search for answers through books or other publications. But by doing so, they are again following a set frame.

B.Cancer (June 22-July 22)
Cancer like to think with their familiar habits and ideas. In fact, they believe they do so because these habits are the right ways. That is why they are locked by their own thoughts.
 
III. Prematurely moving to action: Wait! We are not there yet!

A. Aries (March 21-April 19)
Always impulsive, Aries are often too busy moving ahead before hearing or understanding what people are telling them. Or they feel like they know everything and just take action right away.

B. Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 20)
Sagittarius have the vision but lack in clear strategies. They often overlook the necessary details. Sometimes even when they hear you, the messages are not digested into their systems. So they often act before thinking.
 
IV. Listening without hearing: Did you hear me?

A. Virgo (August 23-Sept 22)
Virgo’s head is filled with their own thoughts and ideas, so it’s hard for them to listen. They often choose to endure rather than communicating, and they may complain too. As they complain, it’s harder for them to listen.

B. Gemini (May 21-June 21)
Always on the lookout for something new, Gemini only listen to what they like, such as gossips or the latest news. They are quite used to not listening. As soon as the conversation steers away from their preferred topics, their minds stray too.
 
V. Starting at different points:We say this and you say that

A. Aquarius (Jan 21-Feb 19)
Often thinking in free association, Aquarius often look at things in different perspectives. Sometimes these viewpoints are refreshing and well received; other times these ideas may miss the points altogether, making people wonder: do you know what we are talking about?

B.Gemini (May 21-June 21)
Gemini like happy conversations. Sometimes they come up with ideas they may not necessarily agree to but feel appropriate at the time just to keep the conversation interesting. While they think that would be fun, the topics may not be that appropriate.
 
VI. Showboating: Going overboard

A. Leo (July 23-August 22)
Fearful of being left out or ignored, Leo sometimes deliberately show off traits lacking in others to be the center of attention. And they tend to go overboard in their showboating.

B. Gemini (May 21-June 21)
Gemini are good at changing conversations in different situations; as the result, they pick their words accordingly. Although Gemini are not showy, they may not be sincere in what they say.
 
VII. Scoring debate points: forever argumentative

A. Virgo (August 23-Sept 22)
Virgo never miss a chance to find faults. Due to their complaining nature and attention to details, they are excellent debaters.

B. Aquarius (Jan 21-Feb 19)
Born rebels, Aquarius love to take the opposite side just for the sake of it. They like to push the boundary on ideas and values to establish new norms.
 
VIII. Contrarianism: always on the other side

A. Aquarius (Jan 21-Feb 19)
Aquarius just have to be different. They would be bored otherwise. It’s their nature. It’s a good idea to use this rebellious nature appropriately. If not, the conversation may not go anywhere.

B. Aries (March 21-April 19)
Sometimes Aries can be very stubborn. This is when they will so no to everything. In these cases, it’s pointless to convince them because rationale and reasoning will not work.
 
IX. Having a pet preoccupation

A. Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 20)
Sagittarius think they are always right because they look at things from above. Whatever other normal people argue about are meaningless to them. There is no room for discussion because they are just always right.

B. Capricorn (Dec 21-Jan 20)
Capricorn make their judgments based on their own experiences. So whatever they can do, they think others can do too. But they tend to reject situations they had no previous experiences.
 
X. Aria Singing:Just showy

A. Leo(July 23-August 22)
Leo are enamored with being admired and worshiped. So they don’t care about what others are talking about. Leo want to be in the spotlight. Always.

B. Capricorn(Dec 21-Jan 20)
Capricorn are sometimes control-freaks. They want to control the process and the results of the discussion. They do not like arguments. This may lead to an impression of being too showy.
 
Are you sighing in relief because you didn't see your zodiac sign? Here are some good things about these signs in dialogues:
 
Libra(Sept 23-Oct 23)
Libra are excellent communicators who are also excellent listeners. However, they can be indecisive in judgments at times.
 
Pisces (Feb 20-March 20)
Pisces often lack focus in what they say. They don’t like to stand out. It’s easy to overlook them at times. They seem to be living in their own worlds. Sometimes people think they are not totally there.
 
Scorpio(Oct 24-Nov 21)
Scorpio are not very talkative. But whenever they speak, you will hear them clearly. And they are mostly right on the spot. They are known for their logic and reasoning.
 
Dialogue has the magic power of turning conflicts into collaboration. By considering the unique personalities of different zodiac signs and avoiding their conversation potholes, we can truly communicate and avoid meaningless dialogue
 
<10 Common Dialogue Potholes are from “The Magic of Dialogue “>

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